


Dissonance, Relatively

by BlackKittens



Category: Big Hero 6 (2014)
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Fluff, Implied Sexual Content, Introspection, Sibling Incest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-05
Updated: 2020-02-05
Packaged: 2021-02-27 20:28:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,574
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22571755
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlackKittens/pseuds/BlackKittens
Summary: "There was that cognizant dissonance again, Tadashi mutely noted. Hiro giving him a very unbrotherly squeeze while calling him big brother. Normally, those things did not go together."
Relationships: Hiro Hamada/Tadashi Hamada
Comments: 3
Kudos: 50





	Dissonance, Relatively

Sometimes it was still strange for Tadashi to think about, he thought, as his younger's brother's arm slithered around his side, over his belly button, and around his other side. They were both adults now, he thought, as Hiro's other arm joined his first, securing Tadashi's waist in a firm hold, and his chin planted itself on Tadashi's shoulder. They were twenty-nine and twenty-two. They had both graduated from SFIT with their PhDs in robotics. They lived in their own apartment, one with two furnished bedrooms even though they only used the one, and Tadashi was currently stirring the mac 'n cheese that would be their dinner in front of the stove. Underneath both their shirts were rings strung up on very thin chains, rings that were jeweled with the other's birthstone. Few knew about them; none other than the brothers knew what they were meant to symbolize.

It was still strange for Tadashi to think about sometimes, though, even though it had been four years now. Hiro had only been eighteen for a few months when he sauntered over to his big brother's apartment, threw himself lazily on Tadashi's couch like the typical, lovable bonehead that he was, and started the day that would change their relationship forever. Before that day, they'd merely been brothers. Brothers who had very unbrotherly feelings towards one another, hidden and locked away from each other, but brothers only. Since that day, however, they had become so much more. Most adult brothers didn't live together. Most adult brothers didn't have at-home dates with each other, because they couldn't go out. Most adult brothers didn't have sex with each other. Most adult brothers weren't, in their own views and solely their own views since no one else and no law would ever recognize them, married to one another. Four years. And the rings weren't even a year old yet.

It was strange, he mused silently to himself as he stirred the boiling mac 'n cheese, Hiro's cheek now pressed to his shoulder, his wild hair tickling Tadashi's face, due to just how... _different_ this all was. Bizarre, in a sense. Once upon a time, he had had no romantic or sexual feelings for his younger brother whatsoever. If someone had told his twenty-one year old self that he'd one day consider himself spiritually married to Hiro in all seriousness, he - a typically non-violent man - would have probably kicked their ass.

For most of their lives, Hiro had only been his younger brother. Nothing more. His younger brother whom he adored and would do anything to protect, but that was it. He'd loved him to the ends of the Earth, but only in a platonic way. He hadn't been capable of looking at Hiro in any other way.

Somewhere along the way of Hiro's adolescence, though, that had changed. His little brother grew up. He got taller. His face filled out, lost the baby fat and defined itself. His work stood out more and more, and his work ethic became more focused and less spontaneous. He matured. And Tadashi chest began to flutter in a way he'd always been taught was wrong.

Yet he hadn't been alone. Hiro had started crushing on him, he had admitted, when he was about fourteen or fifteen years old. He'd had his feelings for far longer than Tadashi. He'd struggled with them and the wrongs, while not all the same wrongs Tadashi faced, for a much longer time than he had. He'd gotten to the point he didn't care anymore before Tadashi. That was why he'd come over that day when he was eighteen and confessed. That was why he hadn't been as bashful or taken aback as his older brother had been. That was why there had been no nerves, only grave preparation for disgusted rejection, when Hiro finished explaining to him how he felt and what he'd wanted.

It had been hard for Tadashi to accept at first, even as they got into their relationship. A part of him irrationally felt like he was using Hiro - as if there was any 'use' to get out of a relationship such as this. Hiro was supposed to be his little brother, nothing more. Hiro was supposed to be eternally a little kid in his mind, regardless of how old he got. It would never stop being Tadashi's job, as the oldest sibling, to protect his little brother. Yet there he was, wasn't he, taking advantage of him? Somehow?

This was illegal, he had reminded Hiro countless times in the beginning. They could both go to jail if they were found out. All of their friends would abandon them. Their jobs would no doubt fire them. Aunt Cass would tear herself apart in shock and outrage and might never want to see them again. They were taking a huge risk with this.

Wasn't it easier to simply be siblings? Who said they had to be more?

Fear had spoken loudly to Tadashi in the early days of their relationship.

Their _romantic_ relationship, that was. Their relationship in general had gone back to the day Hiro was born. Tadashi still remembered that. They'd had a relationship before Hiro's confession, and that relationship had not died. A new facet had merely been added. Several new facets.

It was dissonant, Tadashi supposed. Brotherly love, romantic love - those weren't things people considered together. A couple could not have both. Not unless the brotherly love was not literal, where a couple had simply had a brother- _like_ relationship before the romance got involved. That was fine. Being biological brothers who came from the same parents was not. Thinking of Hiro as his brother and thinking of Hiro as his lover in the same vein, it caused him cognizant dissonance. As if he could only see him as one at a time. Which was stupid, really, since Hiro was both of those things at once all of the time, not one and then the other and back to the one next, but that was that, Tadashi resigned to himself with a sigh.

"What'cha thinking about?" Hiro asked from his shoulder.

Tadashi shrugged and turned his head. Their noses were less than two inches apart. "Nothing important. Little, stressful things, I guess. Not anything to worry about."

"Hm," Hiro hummed. He tilted his head and Tadashi found himself automatically returning the kiss that was pressed to his lips. "Well, stop. You're going to burn the mac 'n cheese."

"What? Oh!"

Tadashi took one look at the severely boiling pot threatening to bubble over the sides and quickly switched the oven off. He offered Hiro a sheepish grin in apology.

"Wasn't paying attention, my fault," he admitted.

Hiro smiled in amusement, his eyes lidded, and gave Tadashi's waist an affectionate squeeze. "Don't worry about it. But man, you should really take some pointers from me. I can multi-task with the best of them. Remember when I was a kid and I used to do my homework, eat noodles, and play video games all the same time? I didn't choke, I didn't fail, and I didn't lose. Fun stuff! You almost burned our dinner thinking of _'little'_ things, big brother."

There was that cognizant dissonance again, Tadashi mutely noted. Hiro giving him a very unbrotherly squeeze while calling him big brother. Normally, those things did not go together.

Twisting around, Tadashi caught Hiro by his own hips and shifted them so he was leaning back on the counter, Hiro's hips pulled against his. He smiled teasingly, and pecked Hiro's nose.

"Do you want to _help_ cook?" he asked, wiggling his eyebrows. "Since I apparently can't do it on my own."

"Hmm," Hiro hummed again. He leaned forward and languidly wrapped his arms behind Tadashi's neck. "Maybe. Except I'm feeling lazy. I want to eat, lay down and watch TV, and go to bed. What's in it for me if I help you cook?"

The little grin Hiro offered him was cat-like in nature.

Tadashi scoffed. "Besides an edible meal?"

"Yes, exactly. What are you going to give me?"

He curled his lips. "What do ya want?"

Hiro's cat-like grin grew. His eyes remained lidded. "What are you willing to give me?" he purred.

More cognizant dissonance. The same individual he had once dragged out of a bot-fight and called him a nerd for going to college was being so suggestive with him right now. Tadashi almost couldn't believe it sometimes.

He pretended to think for a moment, rolling his eyes to the ceiling as if in contemplative thought. "Let's see... What if when you go to bed, I give you a present?"

Hiro's eyes lit up with interest. "Which is?"

"A good night's sleep without any ear-grating noise from the living room while I work on my latest plans," Tadashi mirrored his grin, and plopped a wet kiss on Hiro's lips. He lightly pushed his pouting brother away, turning back to the stove to pick up the pot for draining over the sink. "I'd hate to keep you up. Grab the cheese, bonehead."

"You're no fair," Hiro whined, handing him the colander sitting on the counter instead. "I was thinking a blow job."

Tadashi snorted and rolled his eyes. "Because it's so special when I suck you off. Like I don't do that at least twice a week."

"You're so _mean_ to me!" he accused, a hint of a smile threatening to cross his features as he watched Tadashi dump the noodles into the colander. "Maybe I really appreciate your mouth, ever think of that?"

"Except when words come out of it? Especially words that tell you what to do, or right from wrong?"

"Everything comes with its pros and cons."

"You're a brat."

"But I'm _your_ brat."

"Can't argue with that," Tadashi chuckled. He dumped the noodles back into the pot and set it back on the stove. "Cheese, little brother; and the milk and butter while you're at it. Can you do that for me?"

Hiro looked at him slyly, like he was tempted to retort something defiant and enjoy Tadashi's consequential disgruntlement, but ultimately picked up the cheese packet wordlessly and went to fetch the milk and butter from the fridge. He set them all down next to the stove.

"Thank you," Tadashi plucked up the cheese.

Hiro returned to his position behind Tadashi's back, arms around his stomach and chin dug into his shoulder. Tadashi went on with his cooking, pouring a bit of milk and scooping a spoonful of butter in before mixing it all together.

Eventually, he heard Hiro mumble in his ear, "I'm kind of craving rice. Think rice would go well with macaroni?"

Tadashi halted. "Macaroni and _cheese?_ With _rice?_ All right, tell me here and now, are you pregnant?"

Hiro laughed under his breath. "Yes. It's a boy. We're naming it Stitch after Lilo and Stitch and that's final. Congratulations on knocking me up, Tadashi, I didn't know I could get pregnant without a uterus. Heheh. No, you big dumby, I just feel like eating some rice and don't want all this mac 'n cheese to go to waste is all."

"Well, you're making the rice yourself," Tadashi told him. "As soon as I finish stirring this, my cooking duties are over for the day. Do you wanna put the extra mac 'n cheese in the fridge for tomorrow instead? It's not a big deal if you don't eat it tonight."

"Day old macaroni sucks," Hiro tsked, apparently offended by the notion of saving food for later. "Besides, I don't want your hard work going to the trash. I'll eat both."

"So kind," Tadashi mocked lightly. "Or I can save it for tomorrow, you know. I don't mind day old food as long as its preserved properly. Remember when you left Chinese food out on your work bench over night and decided to eat it for breakfast the next morning? And got sick afterwards?"

"Now you know why I don't eat day old food anymore!" Hiro exclaimed happily. "Preserved or not! No, I'll eat it. I'm starving. Trust me, I have enough room for both."

"If you say so." Tadashi lifted the pot and headed for the counter on the other side of the stove, where two bowls sat in preparation for their dinner. Hiro disentangled himself from him. "Go get started on your rice, then."

Hiro did no such thing. Rather, he leaned back on the counter on his side, propping an elbow on the tiles and holding his jaw up. When Tadashi finished distributing the mac 'n cheese and went to put the pot and ladle in the sink, he caught his arm and leaned his head on his bicep. Even as adults, Tadashi was still taller than Hiro, six foot to his five-eight. Tadashi regarded him curiously.

"I love you," Hiro said, sincere and casual at once. "Thank you for making dinner."

He blinked in surprise. "No problem. I love you, too."

Hiro let him go with ease and moved towards the cabinet where they held all their boxed and canned goods, as if nothing had happened.

Tadashi shook his head slightly and stepped in front of the sink, setting the cookware down and turning on the faucet. Sometimes Hiro did that - got all sentimental out of nowhere, and as quickly as it occurred, moved on. Tadashi didn't know where it came from. He didn't mind it, though. Inside their apartment was the only place they could act with such affection. As far as the rest of the world was concerned, Hiro was a lazy bum who didn't want to use a portion of his paychecks that always went to his inventions and processed food to get his own place, and Tadashi was the long-suffering older brother who let his baby brother use him as a crutch. It was a good thing they were so close, their friends had teased; they wouldn't want to live with their own siblings (or cousins, in Fred and Honey Lemon's cases, being only childs). Tonight, Hiro would cuddle up with him in bed and put his hand a little too close to Tadashi's dick for most siblings' comforts, and tomorrow at work, he'd throw pieces of torn, crumbled up bits of paper at him to get his attention in the office portion of their work building. There would be no kisses, dates, or waist-squeezing hugs, and few I Love Yous, if any.

The dissonance was still there. It unnerved Tadashi, on some deep, deep, hard to reach level. But it was okay; it didn't unnerve him to the point of bothering him. It was simply an awareness that...this wasn't how anyone would expect it to be. Brothers and lovers didn't typically go together. But just because they didn't didn't mean he was ashamed or upset, disgusted by or guilty about their relationship. Not really, not anymore. He was happy with Hiro. He was happy with where they were.

Turning off the faucet and saving the real cleaning for after dinner, Tadashi slid behind Hiro on his way to the filled bowls, mimicking his hug from behind as Hiro dumped a box of rice into a new pot. He nuzzled his brother's cheek, soaking up the delighted expression that folded across Hiro's face at the gesture. He didn't regret what they were in the slightest.

The dissonance was hardly relative to how much he loved him.

**Author's Note:**

> I have a weird relationship with this ship. I went from being squicked by it to fascinated with it, and while I wouldn't say I ship Hiro and Tadashi at the moment - the ship doesn't give me the same feels that others do, and I mostly prefer them as overly affectionate, platonic brothers (but who knows what I'll think in the future; 2018!Me certainly didn't ever expect to get this far) - I do very much enjoy it.
> 
> Not sure how much Hidashi I'll write in the future or when, but I will say this isn't the only idea I have in mind. Not even my first. I'd like to write more of them in time.


End file.
